Emotional Roller Coaster

Pixabay - bykst

I'm near the end of my manuscript edit for something like the 50th time, and my character has gone through some heavy emotional bullshit, and you know what? So have I! She's a moody little bitch, and any time her mood shifts, so does mine.

I have this theory, that the best way to project emotion into my writing, is to imagine myself in my character's position, and the thing is, I have a pretty damn good imagination. I'm sure my character borders on psychotic, her anger replacing any warmth she might feel, but holy hell, she makes me tired.

Today I've been angry to the point of exhaustion, broken, verging on tears, and practically drunk on the power of being a goddess, which I obviously am not. I really have to be careful when I'm editing my manuscript at work (at lunch of course), or I could find myself in some serious trouble. It's not like I could use the excuse that my friends have been lying to me for over ten years, telling me they're human when they're not, or that I'm some sort of freak witch goddess with a bounty on my head, and unfathomable power. Somehow I don't think that would be a good excuse to bitch slap someone. They'd lock me up, and rightfully so.

So I'm wondering whether other authors go through the same emotional roller coaster, whether readers inject themselves completely into a character the way I do, even when I'm reading someone else's book. I can see the explosion in my hand, hear the snarky comments by the jerk in the Armani suit. I can smell the sickly sweet tea, taste the acidy bile, and feel the blade going into my chest.

Am I crazy? Or passionate?

Well, I think I'm just creative. I think. Maybe a little crazy too. Okay a lot of crazy, but isn't that what makes us different? You know,...creative people. Our brains don't work the same as everyone else's. We break, we bleed, we day dream, we get lost in fantasy and sleep on a cloud of artistic possibility.


Pixabay - Bonnybbx