Still procrastinating!

Wow! Just Wow! It's been, what, months? Since I last wrote on my blog talking about how I was unsure whether to self publish or go the traditional publishing route.

The insane thing, the wow thing! Is that I still haven't finished the damn thing. I've been working on my manuscript for nearly 5 years... more! I can't even remember when I started, why I started. I just know that I've read the same book every day for god knows how long. I love my story, I love my characters, but no matter how many times I edit, I always, always find something else I want to change, or change back, or delete, or add. It's never ending.

I know at some point if I want my book to be published, I will have to bite the bullet and send that sucker out, but it's hard. It's like a part of my life, my baby, my comforting blankie. I can't let it go.

So what should I do? Should I send the first few chapters off to every literary agent that will accept unsolicited material? Should I edit one more time? Should I send to an editor for their honest opinion and feedback? Should I self publish on amazon and hope that it's good enough?

Some days it feels like the never ending story. Great, now I have that song stuck in my head.

See, I have a messy brain, full of characters, scenarios and stories, along with the analytics of an analyst that picks apart every tiny sentence. I can always find something wrong, not only in my book, but just about every other paranormal young adult book I've read.

My partner laughs at me when I get worked up watching movies. If I can't understand it, I get angry. Even magic needs to have some kind of fundamental base that's plausible. It just does. If you're going to give your character the ability to summon something out of thin air, like a knife for example, you can't just wack it in at the end if they haven't been able to do anything remotely similar throughout the book, and then try to justify it by saying the knife isn't a tangible item, it's a thought!! Huh? What? It makes no sense, right!

No, you can't. Because analyst's like me are going to pick that sucker apart and walk away shaking our heads.

See what I mean, I have a messy mind. I have no idea how I ended up on one of my pet hates or the tangent that followed. Right now, right this second, I have that stupid song in my head, Aga doo doo doo, push pineapple shake a tree... I have no idea where it came from.

So, yeah, that's my problem, the reason I procrastinate so much. The reason I haven't sent my manuscript out to everyone who will read it.

See, I'm procrastinating right now!